Thursday, August 19, 2010

Heard on the Wind

Throughout the summer season The Skagway News paper publishes a section called "Heard on the Wind".  This is a section where people can submit stupid/funny/annoying things that tourists ask or say.  I should have been entertaining you with these all summer, but since I'm a slacker you are only going to get from here until the end of the season.  The Skagway News is published every two weeks.

Here is August 13th:

A guy comes into the rock shop oooohing and aahing at all the rocks saying what a great place this is for rocks.  The owner told him it is.  Then he says it must be a real haven in this area for a gynecologist.

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Another story at the rock shop, a female tourist inquired about how to care for the semi-fragile rock she was considering.  Off the top of her head, the storekeeper suggested she not drop it.  "I mean how do you bathe it?"  she asked.  The shopkeeper was dumbfounded.  After sharing this story with another local, it was suggested that she should have told her to use "soapstone".
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A woman, while renting a bicycle, inquired of an employee where the nearest Whole Foods was.  The employee responded that nearest one was probably in Seattle, to which she asked where Skagway does its shopping.  When the employee answered that we have the Fairway Market she replied, "I have never heard of that chain.
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A young man looking at the trail map asked if the white areas shown were glaciers.
"Yes," said the clerk, happy to talk with someone who had an intelligent question "those are the glaciers and snowfields".
The young man then asked if that is where the polar bears lived
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A woman comes into the visitor center and asks, "How old is this building?"
"About 110 years!"
"Oh," she said, "I can't believe it's still alive!"
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A man looking at the AB Hall asks: "Is the front of the building made out of antlers?"  (it's made out of sticks!)
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A lady came up to the train station window and said, "We want to go the Summit".
The agent said, "OK".
She then asks the price and when told its $115, she goes "Whaaaaat?!  I heard it was $4."
The agent kindly tells her no, that it was in fact $115.
She then said, "so when you get to the Summit you can see Russia right?"
The agent laughed but said nothing.
The visitor then said, That's a joke in the United States."
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A couple of RVers walk into a visitors center and ask where is a place to dump their RV.  A map is brought out and an RV park is identified.
"But they charge," the couple say with horror, "Doesn't the city provide a free dump?"
"It takes money to get rid of it," the person behind the counter says, and the couple go away miffed.
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A woman came into the visitor center and asked if she was near her hotel.
"Which hotel?" the staff behind the counter responded.
"The place I left my luggage at."
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A man came into the visitor center and asked how tall the mountains are around town.  He was told approximately 5,000 feet.
"That can't be," the man responded. "The train only goes to 2,000 feet."
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One couple riding the train asked, "How often do the rangers build the glaciers?"
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On a hot day last week, a power company worker heard a visitor say, "I don't see why it has to be hot here.  If I come to Alaska, it's supposed to be cold.  I want it to be cold!"

Hope you got a chuckle from some of these.  We get them all day long!!

1 comment:

Susan Stevenson said...

I am always amazed by the misconceptions that tourists (and outsiders) have about Alaska. We hear some crazy stuff here too. I overheard some folks visiting Fairbanks complaining about the 85F heat wave we were having. They brought winter coats with them and were angry that it was so hot. They thought it was cold here all the time.

It's OK though... I like when they have these false ideas about AK. It keeps folks from coming here in droves. *grin*

Susan in North Pole